What It's All About

So in my last post I talked about Connor's current season of tackle football with the KYF Texans. I had a few more thoughts I've been wanting to share but debated on whether I should. In the end, I realized that writing down my thoughts actually helps me and maybe someone else could relate. So here goes.

Even before Connor could walk and form complete sentences, he was a boy with an incredible love of football, specifically the NFL. Yes, maybe he was brainwashed, but anyone who knows him will admit that it seems to run through his veins!

Connor at 8 months old, intently watching his Houston Texans with his Daddy.

Over time, Connor's love for the game of football has not diminished at all. If anything, he is obsessed with it and has an ever-growing knowledge of the sport, the players, and everything that goes with it. All of his school papers are about football, his personal journals are all now playbooks with X's and O's, and any spare moment he can be found outside throwing the football. He loves to play it, he loves to watch it, and he's always talking about it. Yes, he is a boy obsessed!

Once Connor was old enough, he started playing flag football and then moved on to tackle football last year. We knew his love of the game was genuine because he couldn't wait for his games and even his tough practices, despite the sometimes intense weather conditions (extreme heat, shivering cold rain). Any chance he could get, he wanted to be on the field playing with his team. He feels that way even today. No matter what alternate activity you could throw at him -- other sports, video games, trips to fun places, you name it -- he will always choose football over anything.

Our little Texan, #90

So now I will do an unpopular thing and get very honest about Connor and his football abilities. As much as Connor LOVES football, well, he's just not very good at it. Don't get me wrong; Connor has many strengths and talents, but playing football just isn't one of them. We've watched all of his teammates progress over the years and come back each season bigger, faster, and stronger. Unfortunately, Connor just hasn't progressed at that same rate. The coaches continue to work with him on his skills -- blocking, tackling, running -- but despite Connor's passion for the game, he doesn't seem to possess the speed and aggressiveness that kids his age are now developing.

We have had a lot of conversations about this in our house this fall so it's a topic weighing on me. As Jeff and I watched Connor lose his starting positions and then become relegated to just playing on special teams, it became hard to contain our frustrations. We had many talks with him about getting more aggressive and working hard to earn his spots back. There was even a time recently when I was questioning our ongoing participation in this sport -- after all, it's a huge family commitment to get Connor to 3 practices every week plus the Saturday games when he's only getting the minimum play time (7 plays per half each game) and not showing signs of improvement in his skills.

Connor lining up on special teams for the kickoff.

With each new Saturday this fall, Jeff and I had to fight our feelings of frustration that our kid was the one always on the sidelines. We cheered all of the other boys on, always hoping that Connor would get another chance and that maybe this time it would click and he would show the aggressiveness required for this sport -- this sport that he couldn't possibly love any more than he already does.

Connor on the sideline, waiting for his number to be called.

But after a few weeks of selfishly feeling sorry for myself (on behalf of Connor, or so I assumed), I took a step back from it all and thought about what football really means to us -- Connor individually as well as the family as a whole. I eventually came to the realization that this season of youth football accomplishes so much more than just football.

Multiple times each week, our family and friends come together to support Connor at his football practices and games. He is gaining incredible knowledge of a game that he loves and gets a high level of physical exercise most days of the week due to his busy practice/game schedule. Connor continues to experience the true benefits of team camaraderie week after week on the sidelines as well as at practices. He is learning what it takes to be a good friend and teammate, encouraging and supporting his fellow players after big plays and games. He has formed lasting friendships with kids from our area, and he continues to learn valuable life lessons about leadership, sportsmanship, and teamwork.

Connor with one of his teammates, Mason, enjoying a halftime break.

The list of worthwhile aspects from his participation in football could go on and on. So if Connor isn't bothered by his lack of play time, then why should I be? He loves this sport so much, he couldn't care less what position he plays or how many snaps he takes. Maybe the real lesson here has nothing to do with teaching a kid about his strengths and weaknesses, but more about teaching the parent how to manage her ego when her child isn't the best at something he does.

Connor LOVES football. It's his singular focus and passion in life, at the ripe old age of 8. Regardless of the outcome of Connor's football abilities, I continue to realize that the football experience (or any sport for that matter) is so much bigger than just the actual game of football. The positive benefits we are all gaining from his participation in this sport far outweigh any frustrations we may feel about his role on the team. Our family makes a big commitment week after week to support Connor in his favorite sport, and when I step back and take a look at everything he is gaining -- WE are gaining -- how could I ever question whether it's the right thing?

The surprising life lessons from football: THAT'S what it's all about.