One of the first steps in my research was to place calls to the daycares in the downtown area. I only located 2 facilities downtown, and I asked them to send me information packets by mail. I walked over to the Montessori location one day during lunch, and although I didn’t get to take a tour, the entry and reception area didn’t impress me all that much. (To this day, I can’t remember why I didn’t go back for a proper tour.) When I received the information packet for Crème de la Crème in the mail, I took one look at the prices and promptly threw the entire packet away. No way on Earth would I pay that price for daycare – way too steep! But as the weeks went by, I realized more and more how appealing it would be to keep you downtown. I talked to your Dad about Crème, and he thought it would be a good idea to at least take a tour of the place. So one crisp day in December, we walked over there together and received a tour by a Director there named Brenda.
When we walked into the facility, we immediately noticed how nice it was. The hallways were like sidewalks and the classrooms were like storefronts. The Directors wore jackets and the staff wore matching Crème uniforms. Brenda walked us through the facility, explaining things like the curriculum and the different age groups, but mostly I only remember paying attention to the discussion about the infant rooms. (That’s all I cared about at the time!)
We noticed right away the absence of typical daycare characteristics: smelly diapers, screaming babies, etc. Instead, we were greeted with lovely nursery music and calm babies being held and rocked by daycare workers that seemed like typical grandmothers. The overall atmosphere was serene, which isn’t what we expected for a daycare facility.
The other thing I remember noticing was the comings and goings of parents, spending their lunch hour playing with their babies in the various rooms. Immediately I could envision myself visiting you, enjoying bonding time and playtime that I wouldn’t get if we chose a daycare further away. Crème was a mere 6-7 blocks from my downtown office – the location couldn’t be beat.
I vaguely remember the rest of the tour – the computer lab, math lab, library, TV studio, gym, etc. Needless to say, we were greatly impressed by the entire facility and walked out of that place wondering why we had taken that tour—the unmistakable result was that every subsequent daycare we visited would pale in comparison. But were we actually willing to consider paying those astronomical prices?
We were.
When you were 11 weeks old, I faced my first of many challenges as a working mom – dropping you off at daycare for the first time. I later learned that many moms choose to ease into this process by leaving the baby for a few hours a day at first before leaving them for the full 8-9 hour workday. But I guess this idea never occurred to me. My first day back at work after my maternity leave was a full 9-hour workday (including lunch hour) and I arrived at Crème to drop you off around 7:30am.
Knowing that I was leaving you at the top-notch Crème de la Crème was of little consolation to me that day. I had already met your main teacher, Ms. Lou, but I was in a highly charged emotional state when I arrived for that first day back after having you all to myself for 11 straight weeks. I was angry at your Dad (he was an easy scapegoat for “making” me return to work), frustrated at the circumstances of what felt like a short maternity leave, and of course, I was feeling extreme guilt for leaving you—my precious, sweet baby boy—with someone other than ME.
Ms. Gladys, the assistant teacher, was so sweet when I dropped you off. She was like a long-lost grandmother seeing you for the first time. She saw how upset I was to be leaving you (at this point I had tears streaming down my face) and she was very comforting, both to me and to you. I should probably mention that you were snoozing and had no clue of my turmoil. You were such a contented baby that you would have been happy anywhere with anyone. As I walked out of the infant room and then out of the daycare, I was so emotionally distraught. I knew you were fine, but I was NOT. That was one of the toughest days for me. I walked over to visit you at lunch, which did wonders for my mood, but I always felt like I was leaving a piece of my heart every time I left you there and walked away.
Those first couple of days back at work after my maternity leave were almost unbearable at times. But even though the emotional strain was hard, the most difficult part was establishing a new routine. Gone were the days where your Dad and I were up and out the door within a half hour. Instead, I would set my alarm extra early (5am) so that I could pump breast milk while your Dad would get himself dressed and then upstairs to wake, dress, and feed you your first bottle of the day. That would allow me enough time to finish pumping, pack your daycare bag and bottles, pack my pumping equipment to use during the day at work, and then get myself dressed and ready to head off to work. Your Dad would strap you in your car seat and then I would head for the HOV lane for school and work. Phew, I’m exhausted just thinking about all that. Needless to say, there were several mornings in the beginning where I forgot something important. One day I forgot to pack the nipples for your bottles, so I had to make a trip to the downtown Randall’s to buy you a new bottle to use that day. Another day I forgot your pacifier (which you loved); so another trip to Randall’s yielded 2 brand new ones. I recall on one of those mornings, I didn’t make it into my office until close to 9am (my normal start time was 7:30)! Even despite the 5am alarm!
Within a month or so, I had pretty much established a solid routine. It seemed to get easier every day, and I was actually starting to enjoy work again. From the time you started daycare until around 6-8 months of age, I remember visiting you during my lunch break frequently. During the first couple of weeks, I was there everyday. Even on my busy weeks I usually visited at least once per week. After around 8 months of age, you enjoyed my visits so much that it became hard to visit without leaving you upset. Slowly, my visits tapered off. Eventually, when you moved into the Toddler section, my visits became disruptive to your routine, so I stopped visiting altogether.
Many of the daycare staff fell in love with you from the beginning. You were such a happy, chubby baby and everyone seemed to be taken with you. Even some of the other parents would comment to me how precious you were. Ms. Brenda always greeted us in the mornings with a sweet story about how much she loved you and how she tried to steal your kisses everyday. At the first daycare Christmas party we attended, we met Benjamin’s mother Julie. She told me that day that she thought you were so cute, sometimes even cuter than her own son Benjamin! By a stroke of good luck, one of the new teachers in your baby room, Ms. Cindy, because enamored with you and began calling you her “gordito”. Pretty soon it was well known in the infant wing that Ms. Cindy was your girlfriend, and you two flirted shamelessly with one another. All in all, the wonderful people at Crème made me feel reassured of our decision to pay the extra money so that you could attend the best daycare and be closer to my job downtown.
