Connor's First Steps

Dad got tickets for us to the Astros game in the Diamond section (with the private clubhouse and indoor buffet area) about a week after you turned 1. By this time, you were walking well as long as we held both your hands. During the game, I was walking with you in the clubhouse, and I noticed that I let go of your hands and you kept going another few steps! I thought it was a fluke, so I tried it again and again. By the third time, I realized that you were officially taking your first steps!

I went outside to our seats and exclaimed to your Dad that you were taking your first steps. He promptly followed us back inside where you started stepping back and forth between us. It was so exciting for all of us, and of course, you were enjoying all of the attention and cheering! And wouldn’t you know, it was the one time we didn’t have either our camera OR camcorder for the event!

The next day we captured some video of you walking to Collin and Kevin at home. From that point forward, you took walking at your own pace. Until about a month later, you would still switch between crawling and walking at will (unlike your cousin Makenna who took her first steps and never looked back!) You were still pretty wobbly and didn’t become a great walker until around 14 months.

Signing Times

We started teaching you sign language early on to see if it would help you communicate better with us. It was amazing to me how quickly you picked it up. Your first sign that I can remember clearly was “airplane”. We’d take you outside and you would hear the airplane, but it was hard for you to spot them at first. When Dad would show you the airplane sign, he would also make the noise “Sshhh”, so soon thereafter you were making the sign while saying “Sshhh” when you would spot an airplane in the sky.

Another one of your first signs was “Dog” (the “dog” sign is patting your thigh and sometimes snapping after you pat.) We would see dogs in the neighborhood or at friends’ homes and you loved them! One day I noticed that you saw a dog and started patting your belly and saying “Daw”. It was so cute! No matter how much we tried to get you to pat your thigh, you always patted your belly instead. Soon thereafter, you were so good at saying “Daw” (for dog) that you stopped signing it altogether.

Another sign you learned was “Bird” but it took you several weeks to get that one down since you didn’t quite have your pinchers working yet! Around age 1, you also learned “milk”, “eat”, “more”, “all done”, “fish”, and “banana”.

You learned “banana” almost instantaneously when we were in the grocery store one evening. Of course, bananas were one of your favorite foods. So I stopped in the produce section and picked up some bananas while showing you the “banana” sign. Right then and there you started doing the sign back to me! I was so impressed with your signing skills.

Around 14 months, I noticed that you started putting 2 signs together. You would sign “more banana”, “eat milk”, or “eat banana”. Very impressive.

Big Scare

Soon after you turned 1, there was a time that we were both sick (you had an ear infection and pink eye, and I had a sinus infection and pink eye) and had to stay at home for a few days. On the 1st sick day, I was feeling miserable but Dad wasn’t able to miss work due to a deadline. So I tried my best to keep up with you (even though you were sick, you were still active and busy) even though I was far less than 100%.

 
At one point in the early afternoon, I was sitting on the couch surfing the Internet while you were playing with your toiletry bag (where I kept your diaper cream, medicines, comb, and all other little items to keep you groomed and healthy). I noticed you playing with a 2-3 ounce liquid bottle of Tylenol with Codeine (it was prescribed for you a few months earlier for the long plane ride to Hawaii in case you experienced ear trouble). I didn’t think twice about it because the cap was childproof and you enjoyed shaking the bottle for the noise effect.

After a few minutes, I looked up again and saw that you were sucking on the cap of the medicine bottle. Something about this struck me as odd, so I got up to look at the bottle. When I pulled it out of your mouth, I noticed that, OH MY GOSH, the cap was OFF and the bottle was completely EMPTY! I paused for a moment as the realization sunk in that you could have drank the entire contents of the bottle (it was previously near full). How could this happen – the cap was childproof!

Immediately I began to panic. I think I screamed “Oh my God!” It scared you to see my reaction, like you did something wrong, and you started crying. I was freaking out but also trying to console you. In my head I was thinking, “This is it. This is the moment I have dreaded – when Connor’s life is at risk. This is what it feels like to be one of those parents with a child whose life is in danger.”

Without a doubt, I knew I needed to make a phone call. My first instinct was to dial 911. I hit the numbers in the phone, 9-1-1, but then I paused and wondered if I should really do that (will they question my abilities as a mother?). Instead I dialed Jeff at work. Fortunately he answered right away. At this point, I was near hyperventilating. But I still had some wits about me, because I was searching the rug for stains of medicine that may have spilled. I also noticed that you had some spots on your clothes, but not enough to account for 2-3 ounces, and the rug was patterned which made it hard to spot spills.

Between loud breaths, I told Jeff that I thought you drank the entire bottle of Tylenol with Codeine. He was very calm and asked how much spilled versus was swallowed. I still couldn’t find any spill spots on the rug, so Jeff stated that we should call the doctor. The doctor referred us to Poison Control. We called Poison Control and a nice man started asking all the right questions (how old/big you were, how much was in the bottle, how much was spilled on the floor, etc.). By this time, I was very unsettled because the man told us that Codeine was very dangerous for little kids. I started balling, and you were upset to see me crying, so you would come to me and give me hugs and kisses (my sweet Conman!).

Somewhere around this time, I finally noticed two distinct areas on the rug where the medicine had spilled. It was 2 spots, each about the size of a baseball in diameter. When I told Jeff and the Poison Control man this, they both breathed a huge sigh of relief. The spots were big enough to indicate that you had not consumed much of the medicine and therefore you would be fine.

This was one of the scarier moments of being a Mom so far. The thought of something happening to you, especially when it could’ve been prevented (by me), made me feel incredibly irresponsible and guilty. I told all my friends with kids about my lesson learned: Childproof is not necessarily childproof!

No More Mommy's Milk

When you were born, I was convinced that I wanted to try breastfeeding you but knew that I might have a hard time because I had heard so many horror stories about how hard and painful it is. It turned out that you were quite the powerful “sucker” so nursing you was definitely a challenge. But my lifesaver was the breast pump. Even when I was too sore to nurse you, I maintained a steady supply of breast milk by pumping often. It became a joke in our house that our freezer was stocked full of frozen breast milk, and I even made your Dad purchase a generator in case our electricity ever went out (which it was prone to do at the time).

My goal from the beginning had always been to breastfeed you for 6 months. I felt that was a long enough time to give you the nutrients you needed. By that point, I was back to work and it was more difficult to take the necessary time to pump during the day. I convinced myself that at 6 months, I was ready to slowly wean off the pumping. Besides, I had quite a supply built up in the freezer.

I remember a particular day that fall when I was in Dallas visiting friends and I was trying to reduce my pump sessions from 5 per day to 4 per day. At one point during that day, I had to excuse myself from my friends to conduct an emergency pump session because my breasts were SO full and sore from going too long between pump sessions. At that one sitting, I pumped 18 ounces of milk! That was an incredible amount, but apparently my body got the message and very soon thereafter stopped producing as much milk. Within a week or two, I also started getting my monthly cycles again.

So from there, I just gradually reduced the number of times per day that I pumped, and very soon I wasn’t pumping at all. After going an entire week without pumping, I began to feel some regret about my decision, so I actually began pumping again everyday. But by that point, I really didn’t produce enough to make it worthwhile. I was surprised by the fact that I became depressed when I realized that my body had stopped producing milk.

Another surprise was how quickly you went through all the breast milk in the freezer. In order to switch you to formula, we had to mix breast milk with formula to gradually get you used to the taste. You did fine, but internally I was so disappointed in my decision to stop pumping. Looking back, I wish I had continued pumping through the winter season. Most people would say it was just a coincidence (although you won’t convince me otherwise), but as soon as you were drinking 100% formula, you began coming down with illness after illness from the daycare, mostly ear infections. I blamed myself because the breast milk could’ve given you the extra nutrition you needed to withstand the germs going around.

4-5 Months

At 4 months old, you weighed 21 pounds (average for a 9-month-old) and measured 26 inches long. Your latest tricks included lots of noisy gurgles and delightful giggles, and you also recently started to reach for objects -- usually with your left hand! When you turned 5 months old, you were still quite the chunk at 22 pounds. Around this time, you began eating solids starting with cereal and making quite the mess! 

At this age, you were much easier to travel with which made it fun for us to get together with friends and cousins. We LOVED getting the 4 Morgan cousins together and it was never a shortage of laughs and chaos!

Creme de la Creme

While I was still pregnant with you, your Dad and I agreed that I would return to work after you were born, so we needed to make sure and find a suitable place to keep you during the daytime. Since we both worked downtown at the time, I considered finding a daycare close to downtown. I thought it would be an ideal situation because I could ride with you to work (you were my entrance into the HOV lane – and avoiding the bus) but also because I could visit you during the day anytime. This sounded like a much better option than keeping you at a daycare closer to home, which is sometimes an hour’s drive from downtown.

One of the first steps in my research was to place calls to the daycares in the downtown area. I only located 2 facilities downtown, and I asked them to send me information packets by mail. I walked over to the Montessori location one day during lunch, and although I didn’t get to take a tour, the entry and reception area didn’t impress me all that much. (To this day, I can’t remember why I didn’t go back for a proper tour.) When I received the information packet for Crème de la Crème in the mail, I took one look at the prices and promptly threw the entire packet away. No way on Earth would I pay that price for daycare – way too steep! But as the weeks went by, I realized more and more how appealing it would be to keep you downtown. I talked to your Dad about Crème, and he thought it would be a good idea to at least take a tour of the place. So one crisp day in December, we walked over there together and received a tour by a Director there named Brenda.

When we walked into the facility, we immediately noticed how nice it was. The hallways were like sidewalks and the classrooms were like storefronts. The Directors wore jackets and the staff wore matching Crème uniforms. Brenda walked us through the facility, explaining things like the curriculum and the different age groups, but mostly I only remember paying attention to the discussion about the infant rooms. (That’s all I cared about at the time!)

We noticed right away the absence of typical daycare characteristics: smelly diapers, screaming babies, etc. Instead, we were greeted with lovely nursery music and calm babies being held and rocked by daycare workers that seemed like typical grandmothers. The overall atmosphere was serene, which isn’t what we expected for a daycare facility.

The other thing I remember noticing was the comings and goings of parents, spending their lunch hour playing with their babies in the various rooms. Immediately I could envision myself visiting you, enjoying bonding time and playtime that I wouldn’t get if we chose a daycare further away. Crème was a mere 6-7 blocks from my downtown office – the location couldn’t be beat.

I vaguely remember the rest of the tour – the computer lab, math lab, library, TV studio, gym, etc. Needless to say, we were greatly impressed by the entire facility and walked out of that place wondering why we had taken that tour—the unmistakable result was that every subsequent daycare we visited would pale in comparison. But were we actually willing to consider paying those astronomical prices?

We were.

When you were 11 weeks old, I faced my first of many challenges as a working mom – dropping you off at daycare for the first time. I later learned that many moms choose to ease into this process by leaving the baby for a few hours a day at first before leaving them for the full 8-9 hour workday. But I guess this idea never occurred to me. My first day back at work after my maternity leave was a full 9-hour workday (including lunch hour) and I arrived at Crème to drop you off around 7:30am.

Knowing that I was leaving you at the top-notch Crème de la Crème was of little consolation to me that day. I had already met your main teacher, Ms. Lou, but I was in a highly charged emotional state when I arrived for that first day back after having you all to myself for 11 straight weeks. I was angry at your Dad (he was an easy scapegoat for “making” me return to work), frustrated at the circumstances of what felt like a short maternity leave, and of course, I was feeling extreme guilt for leaving you—my precious, sweet baby boy—with someone other than ME.

Ms. Gladys, the assistant teacher, was so sweet when I dropped you off. She was like a long-lost grandmother seeing you for the first time. She saw how upset I was to be leaving you (at this point I had tears streaming down my face) and she was very comforting, both to me and to you. I should probably mention that you were snoozing and had no clue of my turmoil. You were such a contented baby that you would have been happy anywhere with anyone. As I walked out of the infant room and then out of the daycare, I was so emotionally distraught. I knew you were fine, but I was NOT. That was one of the toughest days for me. I walked over to visit you at lunch, which did wonders for my mood, but I always felt like I was leaving a piece of my heart every time I left you there and walked away.

Those first couple of days back at work after my maternity leave were almost unbearable at times. But even though the emotional strain was hard, the most difficult part was establishing a new routine. Gone were the days where your Dad and I were up and out the door within a half hour. Instead, I would set my alarm extra early (5am) so that I could pump breast milk while your Dad would get himself dressed and then upstairs to wake, dress, and feed you your first bottle of the day. That would allow me enough time to finish pumping, pack your daycare bag and bottles, pack my pumping equipment to use during the day at work, and then get myself dressed and ready to head off to work. Your Dad would strap you in your car seat and then I would head for the HOV lane for school and work. Phew, I’m exhausted just thinking about all that. Needless to say, there were several mornings in the beginning where I forgot something important. One day I forgot to pack the nipples for your bottles, so I had to make a trip to the downtown Randall’s to buy you a new bottle to use that day. Another day I forgot your pacifier (which you loved); so another trip to Randall’s yielded 2 brand new ones. I recall on one of those mornings, I didn’t make it into my office until close to 9am (my normal start time was 7:30)! Even despite the 5am alarm!

Within a month or so, I had pretty much established a solid routine. It seemed to get easier every day, and I was actually starting to enjoy work again. From the time you started daycare until around 6-8 months of age, I remember visiting you during my lunch break frequently. During the first couple of weeks, I was there everyday. Even on my busy weeks I usually visited at least once per week. After around 8 months of age, you enjoyed my visits so much that it became hard to visit without leaving you upset. Slowly, my visits tapered off. Eventually, when you moved into the Toddler section, my visits became disruptive to your routine, so I stopped visiting altogether.

Many of the daycare staff fell in love with you from the beginning. You were such a happy, chubby baby and everyone seemed to be taken with you. Even some of the other parents would comment to me how precious you were. Ms. Brenda always greeted us in the mornings with a sweet story about how much she loved you and how she tried to steal your kisses everyday. At the first daycare Christmas party we attended, we met Benjamin’s mother Julie. She told me that day that she thought you were so cute, sometimes even cuter than her own son Benjamin! By a stroke of good luck, one of the new teachers in your baby room, Ms. Cindy, because enamored with you and began calling you her “gordito”. Pretty soon it was well known in the infant wing that Ms. Cindy was your girlfriend, and you two flirted shamelessly with one another. All in all, the wonderful people at Crème made me feel reassured of our decision to pay the extra money so that you could attend the best daycare and be closer to my job downtown.

First Experiences

I remember your first smile vividly. You were about 5 weeks old and you had just finished a full bottle of Mommy’s milk. I could tell you were in a happy mood because you had a very pleasant look on your face. I was holding you on the couch and looking down at you with a smile. Suddenly, the corners of your lips turned upward and I witnessed your very first genuine smile. It was so sweet and endearing that my eyes filled with tears, and the first thing I did (after telling you how much I loved your smile) was call your Dad to tell him the news. I was crying tears of joy and he was excited (although sad to miss it, of course). It is a moment forever etched in my memory.




During my maternity leave, we were lucky enough to get tickets to a Houston Astros game -- your first at only 2 months old. I remember that we had received an Astros onesie in size 9 months, and I was shocked that it already fit you at 2 months old. Goes to show what a big boy you were! We sat with your Dad's co-workers who all oo'ed and ah'ed over you. You were such a great baby, just hanging out in our arms quietly and taking it all in. At one point, a foul ball was popped high in the air and started coming right for us in the stands. Your Dad was holding you and was caught off guard; otherwise he would've caught the ball! I, of course, was terrified that you were going to be hit by the ball. It landed right behind our row!







Another first you experienced was your first Houston Texans commercial shoot! You were about 8 weeks old and your Dad and brothers were invited to participate in the 2006 "I'm a Texan!" campaign. We all dressed up in our best Texans gear -- you in your Texans jersey onesie -- and filmed various spots saying "I'm a Texan!" Your clips didn't make the final cut (only Collin's did) but it was definitely a fun day!






One weekend when you were 6-8 weeks old, your Dad and I decided to take you on your first swim. We got you all dressed in your swim diaper and swimsuit and then we went to the pool at the apartment complex across the street (our neighborhood at the time didn't have a pool). We were only there for about 30 minutes before the sky clouded up and it started to thunder, but it was still a fun first for all of us.






I ended up taking a total of 13 weeks off from work while I stayed at home with you. It was a time I relished and hated to end. During those weeks, you experienced many “firsts” that I tried to capture in your baby book (although I admit that I have no idea where that book is now).